How to mow the lawn

property, small but free

So there’s a story about post-Soviet Russia, of a tourist looking over at some urban green space being landscaped and seeing about ten guys with weed-whackers, laboriously cutting the grass. He asks why it isn’t one man, pushing a gas lawnmower that barely costs more than one of the tools currently in use, getting the job done faster and cheaper. “Mumble mumble…EMPLOYMENT!” comes the answer. The men’s employer is paying ten paychecks instead of one, because it is somebody’s goal (probably a policy goal) to increase paychecks. In effect, the use of the wrong tool for the job is here a welfare program.

And here we are, right in the teeth of an apparent paradox that absolutely confounds an unfortunate number of people. Because “Unemployment,” is the most immediately observed economic evil, make-work measures of this kind that actually discard productivity, are regarded as helpful economic treatments. The Free Market…

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The Loving Family

Guiltless in the veneration
Distracted by adoration
How quickly it slips all away
Neglected responsibilities in the fray

“How great it is to have” you said
Hugging each other before the dead
Taking for granted such a blessed gift
Yet all the while the maintenance drifts

Blissfully blind and deaf ears turned
Enabling and getting them burned
Your brood and priceless treasures
Dominated by Earth’s dark pleasures

I’d apologize at how hard it will all be
If you would wield the tools of honesty

Fast Food Flicks

Breakfast Jack at Tiffany’s

Big Mac Lebowski

Hot Dogma

Fight Wendy’s Chicken Club

Murder Burger by Death

Resevoir Chili Cheese Dogs

The Green Burrito Hornet

The French Toast Sticks Connection

The abuse of context…

Hawt

The wonder of context is to retell the same ambiguous story, from an otherwise uneventful weekend, over and over to different people:

I finally went and saw Avatar with my friend.  She felt the same way about it that I did, I think.  Frivolous spending for an underweight story that has been told eons before, and will be told many times to come.

Oh snap.

Oh, SNAP!

So long without posting.

Inadvertently Badass

I’m not a twit, twat, tweeter, or user of twitter.   Instead of avoiding it and not caring about it, I simply cannot find a way to make it useful for my own life, unlike our celebrity friends.  An article on msn.com today pointed out that SnoopDogg is now on twitter and we call follow him.  Well, surely I clicked on…

Wilfred Brimley

Wilfred Brimley

“Hi. I’m Wilfred Brimley and I have Diabetes. It hurts me to pee and it causes me to be short with my family. I can’t sleep at night. The other day I stubbed my toe and I took it out on the dog. And two weeks ago I ran out of vanilla ice cream and struck my wife. Then I find out my wife’s been dead for six years. Who the hell did I hit?!!” Family Guy, 2005.

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The Revolution will not be Televised

The revolution will not be televised.
The revolution will not be brought to you by the
Schaefer Award Theatre and will not star Natalie
Woods and Steve McQueen or Bullwinkle and Julia.
The revolution will not give your mouth sex appeal.
The revolution will not get rid of the nubs.
The revolution will not make you look five pounds
thinner, because the revolution will not be televised, Brother.